W is for Wirah Wannie Watari
Oh, it's been more than a month since my last update on this blog. I've been very very busy in coping up with my job after a week leave last month as well my current store sales. So as title showed and as some of you may know, I had a miscarriage at my 13 weeks pregnancy. Honestly, I've never ever come to the thought that I will experience this in my life. Cause I think it's rare since I had my 1st pregnancy with wawa going along very well. But well, since it does happened, so I couldn't say anything.
So just update on the story :
I went to check up at my gynae after a long wait of 10 days from the previous visit hoping that I would hear some positive news. Step on the weighing scale and found that I've lost some weight again, I was like "this is weird, I just had my lunch". So the not so good feeling started to pump in. So I did the ultrasound scan again, this time, we don't see the kidney like fetus anymore, instead just big water bag and some weird shape thing. Gynae moving the scanning tool all over my tummy try to look for the lil baby, but the result was disappointed. And because of the weird shape thing we saw, she decided to refer me to Rafflesia Medical Centre. I was told to meet Dr Ramesh there the next morning (10th May) for further clarification on my case. So again disappointed is all I can say at that moment.
The next morning, went to Rafflesia early morning with hubby. Filled in some form since it's my 1st time there, then check on urine and wait for my turn. While on the wait, I'm feeling nervous and all I can do is pray and hope that everything is okay. But though I hope for that, but deep down in my heart I'm pretty much very sure that something is not right. And I even told one of my mommy friend that I'm ready with the worst thing (the baby is not there) that is going to happen.
So when it's my turn, Dr Ramesh took out the pregnancy calculation chart and asked me when was my 1st day of last period, so when I told him end of January. He straight away laugh and put aside the chart and said "if end of January, you should see a baby. It's probably a miscarriage". My heart dropped when I heard that. So he did an ultrasound scan, and same thing like I saw when I did my check up with my gynae a day before, some weird shape thingy appeared on the screen. So Dr Ramesh confirmed this pregnancy is not a normal pregnancy and considered as a miscarriage which is missed abortion. He also told me there's possibility that it's a molar pregnancy.
Some of you may heard of molar pregnancy, it's nothing serious, but once you had it, you might have it again on your next pregnancy, also there is chances that the molar forms to highly treatable cancer. It's definetely not what every woman would want to experience.
So he told me I will have to do a small operation (suction) to clean the un-form fetus. And this can be done either private clinic which cost about Rm850 or the woman and children hospital (we call Hospital Likas) will be much cheaper. So I asked to be refer to Hospital Likas. So Dr Ramesh wrote a letter to have my case to be refer to Hospital Likas. After knowing that it's confirmed that I had a miscarriage, I try hard to not drop my tears in the consultation room. But once I stepped out, I broke down and cried. Although I've already telling myself what to expect, but still it's not easy when the moment came, it's heart breaking as I never thought this really happened. :(
On the same day, after sending wawa to school, I straight away went to Hospital Likas with hubby. Upon reached there, I went to the O&G department and was referred to A&E. Check on me was a male doctor. He read the letter from Dr Ramesh, and told me he will have to check on the Vjayjay, asking if I'm okay. That point, I'm quite lost, LOL! I seriously not feeling comfortable, but I know it's necessary to do that. So want or not I have to let the doctor check. The checking process was unpleasant, as doctor has to insert the spectrum inside the Vjayjay to check. After that, do some scanning, and the result was different from what I saw from Dr Ramesh and my gynae. It was like something big in the water bag. So the doctor told me it could be partial molar means some part is the fetus, some is molar. Either way will have to do suctioning. And I was told to admit to the hospital that day. After checking, the ward was full at that time, so I was told to back at 2pm.
Later went home and pack my bags, I was thinking to get the 1st class wad, so wawa and hubby can stay along as I was worry if wawa will look for me since he always want me to sleep next to him at night. So I checked with Tanya as I remembered she gave birth at 1st class wad Hospital Likas before. So she told me not worth as quite expensive. But because nor sure the exact cost so I still packed all necessary things to the hospital just in case wawa and hubby is staying with me.
On the way (i'm driving) to the hospital, it was raining cats and dogs. So I reached at the hospital about 5pm. Waited awhile then nurse came and help to take blood sample and as well to "cucuk" the thingy where the drip connects on my veins. And gosh, it was painful. Then I was told to go to my ward - Kenanga 4. Once reached K4, I asked the nurse if I wanted a 1st class ward, how much is the charges, they said deposit would be Rm800, I was discussing with hubby if I should take the 1st class ward then the nurse told me no more 1st class ward available. And at the same time, the normal ward is also quite full, so I was told to temporary stay at the bed near the main hall.
Later a Dr named Fiona came and check on me, have some Q&A with me, also take my blood sample etc, and I was also told to start fasting from 12am onwards until the suctioning. Then after everything settle, wawa and hubby went home. My heart feel so sad cause this is my first time to spend my night without my cutie pie next to me. And if saying that I'm worry he might not be ok to be without me, in fact I'm the one that not alright without him around.
Then I have my dinner where my mom bought for me before admitted. Then took some rest. The ward was freaking cold. I was covered in blankets and my own towel, and borrowed wawa's minky blanket which is warm, and breathing under the towel as it's really really cold. At about 10pm, I was change to another room where I was told there is space. Then later at 2am, I was moved to room 7, the last bed in the room. There, I was more comfortable because the air-con is being switched off. A nurse passed me a operation gown and told me to change into it at 6pm.
To be continue..................................
Labels: myself, pregnancy # 2
Be strong!!